The reason I started this blog is because I wanted to keep people up to date with Sam’s journey from diagnosis, through to complete recovery. There was never a plan B. There was always only going to be one result at the end of this. I wanted to keep it informative and (sort of) light hearted at the same time. I wanted to let people, who may find themselves in the same unfortunate situation, informed about what they may experience throughout their own battle with this unpredictable little fu##er. Sometimes it’s been hard to know what to write when times have become a bit scary. I intended for this blog to be updated daily, but sometimes I find that I just go blank. Part of it is not knowing what to write when it’s not great news and some of it is purely to protect Sam from reading a blog (about herself) that may upset or scare her.
What I’ve come to realise during the last 7 months is that not one journey is the same. Everybody’s experience with cancer is different and there are never two experiences that are identical. The treatment side of things are more or less routine, but everybody’s cancer diagnosis is unique to themselves. Sam may have had a setback a couple of weeks ago with the mastectomy, but other people have had their own setbacks too. Sam dodged the HER2 gene but someone else we met didn’t. They now have to have to have the drug Herceptin administered by drip every 3 weeks for the next year. Sam found that her cancer was not really aggressive and responded to hormone therapy, but someone else we met found out that their cancer was triple negative and didn’t respond to hormone treatment. We were told by the cancer nurses when Sam was first diagnosed not to compare her cancer to other people’s experiences (especially ones with unhappy outcomes) because no two cases are the same. I didn’t believe it back then. I do now.
I don’t think I’ve ever been so nervous about an appointment before in my life. I mean, don’t get me wrong, we’ve had plenty of nerve-wracking meetings this year, but this one has to be the most important one yet. I’m not sure we can afford anymore setbacks. All I know is that we’re starting to run out of escape routes. If we get bad news on this one then I’m not too sure which direction we’ll take next.
We’re called into another small (but different) room. Our normal consultant that we normally see is on holiday, so we’re going to see the surgeon who performed the mastectomy on Sam instead. He will discuss with us the results of the tests that we’re carried out on the breast tissue and lymph nodes that were removed last week. What I don’t want to hear is small talk. Please, don’t ask us how we are generally feeling at the beginning of the meeting as this usually only means one thing. The nurse asks Sam if she can remove her top and lay on the bed as the surgeon will want to examine the wound. As she gets on the bed, there is a knock on the door. My heart is literally in my mouth as the door opens. The surgeon walks in with a massive folder, says his hellos and places the folder on a chair.
“How is that wound doing? Ah, it’s exactly how I expected it to be. There is some fluid build up, but we’ll drain some of that today”
(Ok, you’ve checked the wound, now please walk back toward the folder).
“So, how are you feeling generally?”
(Really??? Is this small talk right now? Please walk back toward the folder).
With that he walks toward the folder. As he starts to flick through the pages he starts to talk
“Ok, we’ve got the results of your tests from last week. We removed 17 lymph nodes during the surgery and the tests show that, apart from the Sentinel lymph node that had a small trace of cancer in it back in February, all 17 lymph nodes were clear. This is excellent news because this shows us that the cancer has not spread from the vascular invasion. We also found that throughout the breast tissue there were more pre cancerous cells present, however, the margins were healthy enough to show us that we have removed all of the cancer successfully.”
I think it’s fair enough to say that the meeting was a success. It’s brilliant news. It’s actually the best outcome from Sam’s mastectomy surgery. It’s hard to describe how much of a weight has been lifted from our shoulders but at the same time a slight weight remains. We’ve learnt to become cautious but the fear has, at least for the moment, disappeared. We are told that the cancer is now gone and they don’t expect it to come back. I think that until Sam has a CT scan that shows that she’s all clear everywhere else, then there will always be that slight caution in our minds, but I think this will always be the case as far as cancer goes.
The journey, however, is far from over. We’ve still got radiotherapy to go and now we have the reconstruction road to travel as well. It looks like we’re back on track for the time being and although I’m sure we’ll hit a few more bumps along the way, we will continue to fight and be positive. As it is for the moment though, cancer can kiss our butts. š
funkybald1
Welcome to the Himalayas 
This last 7 months must have been completely sh*t
for you all. Can I just thank you for the blog updates
to keep us informed on Sams journey. Although we are are
not “close” friends, you guys are an awesome couple
and have such an amazing family and I feel that
letting us be a part of this may just help others in
a similar situation. Stay strong and keep smiling.
Shelley xxxx
Excellent results today. Cancer has no friends and can be beaten and totally agree can kiss all our butts. Sending you BIG HUGS & KISSES xxxxxx
FAN-BLOODY-TASTIC NEWS :). My heart was racing reading that blog nervous of how it would end, but what a huge relief. Finally that hideous path you’ve been forced on has given up throwing its hurdles at you. So so happy that you can finally stop dreading every corner now. Much love ā¤ļø
Oh my god, what fantastic news. I’ve been thinking of you today and actually dreading opening my emails tonight. When there was no update earlier it worried me further…….quicker updates needed Rich – sorry! So I have logged back on before going to bed to read this fantastic news. Still a way to go but all in the right direction.
Lots of love to you all xx
P.S Hayden was taking the mickey out of me after we saw you in the car yesterday, he was doing an impression of my stupid voice calling your names! Cheeky monkey, I just noticed you at the last minute and didn’t want to pass without shouting ‘hello’!! xx
Just woke up bleary eyed with a lump in my throat, not knowing what to expect reading this, but this is just fantastic news!! I am so happy for you all, you kicked it’s arse that’s for sure! You’re strength and bravery is inspirational, still a little way to go with reconstruction but that will be a breeze compared to the crap you’ve endured. Well done Sam and well done rich, you are a truly amazing couple and the most wonderful parents. This occasion definitely deserves a wahoooooooooooop!! Loads of love xxxx
That was just wonderful news to wake up to this morning Rich and Sam, I don’t know what else to say as everyone has written what all your friends and family probably feel. But I do know that this is just such positive news and as a family you all deserve it so much and you have all been in my thoughts so many times over the past 7months. Big heart warming smiles and hugs to you all x x x x :))))))
Daer Rich and Sam,Have never prayed sooo hard as I have the last day or two.Havnt liked to ring or text- but found your blog this morn and am over the moon for you all.Brings tears to my eyes how very brave and positive you have been through this horrid time.The support and strength you have for each other has been awe inspiring.Wonderful news for you and all the family,Hope you can now recover well dear Sam.We are still all here for you -dont forget how many people are still and always will be rooting for you.
Much love and God bless Jan Jimmy x x x
Yippee! What a bumpy road you’ve travelled… now keep on walking as there is always something good waiting on the horizon. You are both brilliant… and your little ones are as well.
Loads of love
Liz X
Rich and Sam I feel so emotional writing and reading this blog!!! YOUVE KICKED ITS ASS!!!!! We’ll done! I logged on so many times yesterday and to read this, this morning is the best news I’ve read in ages. I can’t even comprehend how you’ve got through each day each month each visit, all the chemo sessions… The love you guys have for each other really comes through in this wonderfully written blog into your lives of the last 8 months. You really are wasted rich and need to get this published . I know you still have a few other hurdles to cross and I can’t imagine how all these sessions you have gone through Sam without ever moaning…. And also may I add every photo you have had taken with your wigs, your drains….. Always with beautifully manicured polished nails…… Love and hugs to the best news I have heard for a long time…. Love you guys xxxxxxxxxxxxxx nats xxxxx
This has been one hell of a roller coaster ride for you both.You are both truly inspirational people, and I am totally in awe of the way you have coped with this fight. So pleased to hear your news. Love to you all, Leanne x
Oh my…. I’ve just caught up with the last months blogs… Rich’s last one my heart was thumping like mad… With tears in my eyes I write this…you did it, you kicked cancer where it hurts…stay strong and positive for the rest of your journey…xxxxxxx