THE NIPPLE HAS LANDED

It’s not everyday you have a dilemma about whether or not to post your wife’s naked breast online for people to see. I mean, I’m sure there are plenty of husbands that do this every day, but I hope they don’t have a conversation with their children about it first…………

Sam is good but very very sore. Apparently the procedure she had yesterday is much worse than a lumpectomy. I’m sure that both procedures are as bad as each other, but she does look like she’s had a bit of a beating in her armpit.

Most of the side effects are present apart from the blue tinge to her eyes. The bright blue wee is there (not sure about the green bowels though. Didn’t want to ask about that) and the slight grey colour to her skin is there. Although as the evening wore on she became more of a green colour. I said that If they were doing auditions for Shrek the musical then she would get the part of Princess Fiona hands down (I didn’t mean that she looked like an ogre, I meant because she looked green) . Harry looked up at this point and said “Daddy, if mummy is Princess Fiona, then that makes you Shrek”. He then smugly left the room.

Sam has been told that she’s got to be extremely careful with her arm now that she’s had this procedure done. She cannot risk damaging any of the vessels that’s been disturbed within her armpit. If there is any damage then this would delay any chemotherapy treatment that’s scheduled for her. This also means that not only is she is not allowed to use any soap or deodorant in that area for the next 4 or 5 weeks (just make sure you stand on her right hand side when you see her) because of the risk of infection and she also isn’t allowed to do any heavy lifting of any kind. This means no lifting Rosie or Charlie. Rosie isn’t so much of an issue because at her age she can at least walk and do stuff herself (In fact she’s like a micro helper for Sam) but how is she supposed to deal with Charlie when she’s on her own?? With him being only 3 months old it becomes slightly tricky. She could use one arm but I know what Sam is like and she isn’t the kind to sit back and relax. We were going to wrap her arm to her side with a scarf (or some duct tape) just so she wouldn’t use it but she’s been told she has to exercise it so that it reduces the swelling. We’ll figure out something because chemotherapy is too important to delay.

Now, onto the nipple. I got a text message from Sam around 1620 saying that everything was done and that she’s awake and drinking tea.

She then sent a text message 5 minutes later:

Now, I have to point out that this isn’t a text that I’d usually get from Sam at 1630 and if it was under any other circumstances I’d be quite excited. I have to admit though, on this occasion, I was more curious than excited.

Cover your eyes kids 😉

More of a turquoise than a blue I reckon…………